This mother's day was/is exponentially better and easier for me than last year's mother's day. Last year I hosted a mother's day cookout at my house. It was my mom and her husband, my aunt and uncle, and my cousin and his pregnant wife. Don't get me wrong, I love these people and I was happy to spend the day with them. But I spent much of the day listening to stories of pregnancies and baby showers and all things baby related. It was ridiculously hard for me to keep a happy face on while inside I was crying about the fact that we'd been trying for over a year and started treatments and still weren't pregnant. It sucked and I still feel bad because I know my mom could tell I was upset. I didn't want her to worry about me since it was her day but it sucked.
This year is so much different. I hosted brunch for my mom and her husband and my brother this year. There wasn't a ton of baby talk (which is fine) but I wasn't sad or dreading the day. I've been getting Mother's day cards for a week now (my sister sent one almost a month ago cause she couldn't wait:)) and I've gotten phone calls and I even got a mother's day gift from my mom. I'm so thankful and happy that this mother's day was so much different. I can't even imagine what I'd be like today if I still wasn't pregnant.
I know there are many women out there that dread this day and this day only brings them more pain and suffering. And for that, I'm so sorry. I know the pain and I just wish that it didn't have to exist. I wish that all women who want to be mothers could be and didn't have to endure months of pills, shots, procedures, dildo cams, etc. While this day has been a good day for me, I'm still keeping all the women that are still trying to get pregnant in my thoughts and prayers.
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