Wishin', and hopin', and thinkin', and prayin', Planning and dreamin' each night

In honor of Dinner for Schmucks I use this title. Yes the song has nothing to do with infertility and the line is incomplete but those lines describe exactly what these past few days have been like for me. I'm currently 4dpiui. The IUI on Saturday was fine. I was a little annoyed because I had to go down to Rockville since the IUI was on the weekend. Don't get me wrong, I was VERY happy that I didn't have to take off work AGAIN but it took up most of our day. Luckily since it was the weekend J went with me. His sample drop off time was at 11 and the IUI was at 12:30. After the drop off we had lunch and got a speaker dock for our iPhones. Then, we went back to the office so I could get sperminated:P J's sample was pretty good again. This time he had 25mil sperm post wash and 78% motility. When he heard what it was he was a little disappointed because he had done so well last time but I tried to reassure him that those were still great numbers. So I'm hoping I had 3 follie's release eggs. J is way more into getting it "done" this time and has been telling ME when we're supposed to have sex. I appreciate the change and I pray that I'll have good news for him next week.

My beta is on Friday the 13th. I'm trying to think of it as a lucky day for us and it's also our niece's birthday. Currently I'm having a few phantom symptoms but I'm not paying attention to them. I have sore breasts (started at 2dpiui so I know it's just the progesterone I'm taking) as well as some cramping and twinges around my ovaries. It fluctuates which side but it happens at least 2-3 times a day. That happened last cycle as well and obviously it didn't mean anything so I'm not going to think it means anything now either.

I bought more FRER tests today since they were on sale but I need to go to the dollar store and get more tests soon. I think I'm going to start testing on Tuesday. Partially to test out the trigger and partially to ease the let down of a potential BFN. I feel like this week is dragging on but we'll be busy all weekend so hopefully that will help the time pass more quickly. We're going to my niece's birthday party this weekend. I'm excited but I dread the possibility of my sister-in-laws friends asking me (again) when we're going to start trying to have kids. At her 4th birthday party last year I had imagined having a baby in my arms at her 5th birthday party. Yet another example of how much IF sucks.

For now I'm just Wishin', and hopin', and thinkin', and prayin',Planning and dreamin' each night....